Marriage Matters To Children

Marriage done right is a fundamentally pro-humanity, pro-woman and pro-child good. On this International Women’s Day 2016, let’s celebrate it.

“You’re conflating two separate issues” a federal politician told me when I made the obvious point that marriage matters to children. Similar statements along this same lie were made on a recent TV program which debated this issue…

TONY JONES (host): So you can deny it if you like: “The fact is every child in a same sex family structure has been taken from its biological mother or father”. Is that correct? Is that what you said?

LYLE SHELTON (pro-marriage): Yeah, it is, actually, Tony. That is a sharp statement and…

KERRYN PHELPS (marriage-redefiner): You know I’m sitting right here, don’t you?

LYLE SHELTON (pro-marriage): Yeah, I do, Kerryn, and I bear no ill-will…

KERRYN PHELPS (marriage-redefiner): But you know what you’re saying is complete nonsense.

LYLE SHELTON (pro-marriage): It’s not actually nonsense, Kerryn. There is many same sex couples like yourself who are raising kids that have come from a previous relationship.

KERRYN PHELPS (marriage-redefiner): What’s it got to do with marriage?

TONY JONES (host): Sorry, I just want to finish the point. So I’m interested in what you mean by “taken”.

LYLE SHELTON (pro-marriage): Yep. Yep.

TONY JONES (host): I mean, do you literally mean stolen? Are you talking…


TONY JONES (host): No, I’m serious. Are you talking about a kind of stolen generation?

LYLE SHELTON (pro-marriage): Well, we did take Indigenous children and babies from their mothers and give them to loving families but the error that we apologised for was for taking them from their biological mother and father. Now, through assisted reproductive technology, we are taking the child from their biological father or their mother and giving them to someone else. Now, that doesn’t mean…

KERRYN PHELPS (marriage-redefiner): That is nothing to do with marriage, Lyle.

“Men and women of full age, without any limitation due to race, nationality or religion, have the right to marry and to found a family…”
Article 16 of the U.N.’s Universal Declaration of Human Rights

Exactly wrong. It’s got much to do with marriage. Marriage is a compound right, one what comes with the right to found a family.
If there’s any chance of redefining marriage, it comes at the cost of ignoring the rights of children. And ignore it they will at the expense of the most vulnerable in our society – children.

That’s what happens when we compromise the needs of children for the wants of adults.
That’s what happens when marriage is viewed from a shallow, single perspective. Marriage is far richer and more complex than that. It is far richer that just the two people entering into it. It’s also about the children coming from it and the wider society it touches.


If that sounds dramatic, let’s hear from the children themselves. Shallow slogans and superficial polling are used to dismiss this like it’s only a theoretical discussion but it’s not. We’re dealing with real people in the real world. We need to see what actually happens to those who live through the loss of their mother or father.

Please take the time to see this perspective from three very brave ladies. Even better, share it.

In Article 7: Children have the right to know their parents and, as far as possible, to be cared for by them.
In Article 8: Governments should respect a child’s right to a name, a nationality and family ties.
In Article 9: Children should not be separated from their parents unless it is for their own good. For example, if a parent is mistreating or neglecting a child. Children whose parents have separated have the right to stay in contact with both parents, unless this might harm the child.
The UN’s Convention on the Rights of the Child.


My thanks to some readers who alerted me of some of the above content.
Image from a 2015 Marriage presentation I did.

6 Responses to “ Marriage Matters To Children ”

  1. In the beginning, God made man in His own image. Male and female He made them. It was good. “Multiply and fill the earth”, He told them. All good so far in this account from Genesis. Here comes Jesus…in the New Testament Gospels, no less…”Haven’t you read that at the beginning, God made them male and female. Therefore a man shall leave his mother and father and be united to his wife and they shall become one flesh..” There is rather a lot here. Firstly, God made humanity in both male and female forms. That was his design. It should also be noted that God made the woman to be the suitable helper for the man. He also made her from his rib…she’s not above or below him, she’s his equal in marriage. There’s your marriage equality right there. Christ also re-affirms (rather amazingly obviously) that a man must have a father and a mother to begin win. Who would have thought…Then, when the man is old enough, he shall marry a woman who will be his wife. Within the bounds of this relationship, they can fulfil the commandment to procreate. Now, it should be obvious that this design has worked rather well for thousands of years since the beginning. Which part of this do those who advocate corrupting marriage not understand? The answer is all of it. “They neither acknowledged Him as God nor gave Him thanks. Instead their thinking became futile and God gave them over to a depraved mind..”Anything less than what God created and ordained is missing the mark…in fact, that’s exactly what sin is…missing the mark. Spiritual truths are spiritually discerned (by the Spirit of God). This means that those whose minds have not been renewed will resist even such obvious, objective truth. They may throw around their catchy slogans but these are of no value before the word of God. That word is objective truth and carries ultimate authority to which we will all answer.

  2. […] of it? Like other supporters of this program and as shown by the website changes documented above, there is much rhetoric and obfuscation with little response on the actual concerning details in […]

  3. […] had previously referenced this brilliant example. It is especially brilliant given it comes from someone so much younger […]

  4. […] child’s mother and father matters to them. Therefore, so does marriage. To put it in a more poetic […]

  5. […] is an issue that needs to be handled and shared with conviction. It matters to children, it matters to freedoms, it matters to women, it matters to speech, it matters to equality, it […]

  6. […] to redefining marriage. It’s simply logical. That’s why homosexuals and those raised by same sex couples are among those who believe that marriage should not be […]

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